HANDMADE • DIY • BIKES • NEW YORK CITY

sonofbaldwin:

The instantaneous defensiveness, that incessant need to find some “other cause,” that instinctive desire to protect Whiteness and eliminate anti-black racism as a cause for anything and everything is so telling.

They’ll try to rationalize it in any way possible, including gaslighting you, not realizing that this pathological and predictable behavior reveals so much more about them than it does about us.

And it’s all intentional. It’s to preserve their innocence, which is to say, their Whiteness.

That’s why it’s crucial for us not to back down or change the subject or accommodate their comforts and illusions in any way.

‪#‎WhenRacistsTellYouWhoTheyAre‬ ‪#‎BelieveThemTheFirstTime‬

(via whitegirlsaintshit)



The October ‘14 issue of Maximum Rocknroll has a cool review of the Sorrows demo. I feel like a proud mom!

The October ‘14 issue of Maximum Rocknroll has a cool review of the Sorrows demo. I feel like a proud mom!



"Infographic Shows The Differences Between The Diseases We Donate To, And The Diseases That Kill Us"
I think about this a lot, especially since my disease affects more people than those with MS, ALS, and cystic fibrosis combined, yet receives half the funding and a lot less attention. If you want, read more about this here.

"Infographic Shows The Differences Between The Diseases We Donate To, And The Diseases That Kill Us"

I think about this a lot, especially since my disease affects more people than those with MS, ALS, and cystic fibrosis combined, yet receives half the funding and a lot less attention. If you want, read more about this here.



"Him and I, we had a fight
The kind where nobody wins
He used his hands
I pleaded, but he had me pinned
You know when you take a bath and never get clean?
The bruises that never show…
I thought you’d know what I mean.

But you changed your mind
This time, you changed your mind
Because you’re somehow the victim
You changed your mind
So cast it off, it never meant
You changed your mind
because it’s easy, because you can

So you changed your mind

Well, if he’s a monster then you live under my bed
He roughed me up but you left me for dead
And I can get your silence out of my head
But just remember, I know what you did.”

When I very suddenly found myself in an abusive relationship, my mind went in many different directions at once. I was angry and hated the man that I was with, I was scared of him and wanted to run away from him, I was scared of him and wanted to please him so he wouldn’t hurt me again, so we could pretend it never happened and that I was a good enough person. I worried that my friends would be mad at me, that they wouldn’t want to speak to me anymore. I wanted so desperately to talk to some of them and hide away in their bedrooms. I wanted to defiantly stand in front of my abuser and say every perfect thing to make him feel small. But mostly I wanted to close my eyes and forget everything and never tell a single soul.

But I did. The first person I told, who was my ex and the closest person to me at the time, told me I was probably lying because I didn’t leave the abuser immediately. He then made demands that I cut it off with this person, tell him exactly why, and never see him again. When I didn’t do those things, as this was during a time when I could not take care of myself, he said that it was all very hard on him, that I should be proud of him because he managed to stay sober throughout this, that he would never do anything like this to me, and that he would never forgive me. Him and I no longer speak. This song is about my ex and people like him who claim to be allies, who are comfortable supporting minorities against the media or the government, but run back to their privilege once they or someone in their community is called out or challenged. But there’s more to this post than just him.

The second person I told paused afterwards and said, “…wow, this makes me feel differently about you.” On the flip side, I had friends tell me how much they wanted to kill my abuser, how they wanted to hurt him and while a huge part of me loved hearing this, it also scared me. It felt too fresh to talk about direct, harmful things that could happen to my abuser because I imagined how enraged this would make him, and how it would only lead to more violence, and in this way it made me want to protect him so that violence didn’t fall on me. It was those that focused on me and my feelings, who let me talk it out, who didn’t pass judgment even when I did more bad things to myself, who told me it wasn’t my fault, those are the people that helped me through and out of this relationship, and I’m forever grateful that I have them in my life.

It’s important to positively support victims of abuse throughout their whole path of finding sanctuary, even if that means supporting them during times when it may look like they’re taking self-destructive steps backwards, even if the person ultimately stays in the relationship. It may seem like they are actively trying to disregard help, falling farther into a relationship with an abuser, but they may need to work out certain mental processes on their own, and it’s important to let them know that they have unconditional support. It’s difficult to support people in these situations, and if mutual friends can support each other throughout this process, then that’s even better.

I will say that it’s really cool to be in a hardcore band so that I can scream and jump and shout about how angry all of this makes me. And I highly recommend it as a non-traditional form of therapy.



Discovering the Philly music scene with Tiff.

Discovering the Philly music scene with Tiff.



forgottengrin:

Misty prank phone calls Guitar Center with help from Muscles AKA Dawn Riddle & Shellshag

(via shellshag)



I’m so sad to hear Death By Audio, a DIY all ages music venue in Brooklyn, is closing in 2 months. So much of my young adult band and music life has been spent attending, playing, and booking shows there. Truly an end of an era.



A fitting farewell: some pigeons noshing on some friggin New York pizza on my last day as a resident there.

A fitting farewell: some pigeons noshing on some friggin New York pizza on my last day as a resident there.



Anonymous: why are you leaving New York? You sound like you really love it.


That’s a long answer! I’ll try to be brief: I’ve lived in Brooklyn for the past ten years and it has changed a lot from when I first moved there, and I’ve grown increasingly unhappy with this change. My biggest critique is that NYC has become a place in which collective living and intentional community (sorry to throw out that hippie term) has become very difficult or impossible for me. The punk house I lived at for 6 years was evicted on Aug 1st to be renovated into expensive, 1 bedroom apartments, and all the other punk houses I once knew are also gone. There are no more house shows, no more walking to your friends’ houses. It feels like everyone is moving farther and father away as rent increases, all my favorite places are going out of business or being evicted, more chain stores are opening up, etc. I have very little family and it’s important to me to feel like I have an accessible community. There’s a lot more to say about this, I apologize. Right now I’m paying less than half the rent in Philly than I was in NYC and I live in a beautiful 3 story house. I’m also trying to go to school for nursing and wanted to live in a cheaper place so I could go to school full time and work part time, unlike in NYC where I was doing the opposite. But don’t get me wrong—NYC is and will always be the coolest city. The true heart, of what I really believe to be the city (the noise, the accent, the people, the flow, all the old shit etc) will always be my home and always have a place in my heart.




Sorrows is on this week’s MRR Radio along with a bunch of cool new bands! Stoked!



I printed some “Heart of Gold” t shirts to commemorate my love of New York and Neil Young. I’ve been listening to the song “Birds” a lot this week and feeling emo about leaving this city. 

Front and back print, with a gold printed heart  on front and an image on the back of Neil Young from his greatest hits album. Get in touch if you want one! 

A big thank you to Jason and Thom for helping me get these screens made.

I printed some “Heart of Gold” t shirts to commemorate my love of New York and Neil Young. I’ve been listening to the song “Birds” a lot this week and feeling emo about leaving this city.

Front and back print, with a gold printed heart on front and an image on the back of Neil Young from his greatest hits album. Get in touch if you want one!

A big thank you to Jason and Thom for helping me get these screens made.


"Don’t Shred On Me" - my first joke tattoo at 31, thanks to Tron who’s now done about half my tattoos. This kinda wraps around my arm a little bit and was really hard to take a picture of! Almost considered a panorama.

"Don’t Shred On Me" - my first joke tattoo at 31, thanks to Tron who’s now done about half my tattoos. This kinda wraps around my arm a little bit and was really hard to take a picture of! Almost considered a panorama.



Chris stopped to take a pic of me on our way to Philly, getting back to my train hopping roots.

Chris stopped to take a pic of me on our way to Philly, getting back to my train hopping roots.



Printed some Sorrows patches, 6 by 3 inches with our little cassette demo for reference. Sew it on something cool!

Printed some Sorrows patches, 6 by 3 inches with our little cassette demo for reference. Sew it on something cool!



My “about to jump” or “about to land” face on Jen and Shell’s cyclorama

My “about to jump” or “about to land” face on Jen and Shell’s cyclorama